My G reader

According to a reading level benchmark sheet Lillian (one of my dearest friends and 1st grade teacher) sent me, Lauren is reading at a level one year ahead.  I recently attended a Reading and Writing Workshop where one of the bullets covered was how the school levels books, NOT children.  It's hard not to do this between me, Tae and my mom but in front of Lauren, we do just share that she is reading G books, not that she is a G reader.  (Isn't my title "My G reader"?!  In any event, Lauren is rocking her reading. 

Valentine's for Lauren's friends

This year, Lauren made her own Valentine's for her classmates.  We went to Paper Source and got a bunch of cards and stickers.  In true Lauren fashion, she sat through one and a half hours to make a card for each of her classmates - in both Kindergarten classes!  I think they are simply great.  She is going to have so much fun distributing these.   

We picked up the same materials for E but I will be making them for her. 

Luck on my side

Ask my mom, Tae or my friends.  One of the things they'll say about me is that I have luck on my side.  Certain "lucky" things happen only to me.  For example, last year, I won a two-night/three day vacation to Minerals Resort & Spa (yes, I realize it's a Jersey vacation but still!).  About five years ago, the cashier at Target mistook a barcode scan beep from another aisle with hers and I ended up not being charged for an entire bundle of paper towels.  Almost 10 years ago on my 29th birthday, I won $1,000 in cash at Mohegan Sun Casino doing a promotional blackjack card swipey thing.  Just this past holiday season, a beautiful blue enamel bracelet from J. Crew was included with my online order - I did not order the bracelet!  You get the idea.

Last night, Tae and I attended a Reading and Writing Workshop at Buckley hosted by Lauren's Kindergarten teacher Mrs. Bianca Lavey.  Each family was given a raffle number.  Our number was 5.  It wasn't a 10 or an 8 (my personal lucky numbers).  One of the raffle prizes was a beautiful basket filled to the brim with books, writing instruments, post-its and bookmarks.  The second was a recommended book about reading and literacy development in children.  After Mrs. Lavey's presentation, the raffle was drawn.  One of the First Grade teachers got up to pick the first number.  FIVE!  We won the beautiful basket!!!  I had a feeling I would win.  ;-)  Apparently, so did Tae.  The girls of course were so thrilled when we came home with this beautiful basket.  We will open it together tomorrow, Fri, February 8th when we are all home together.

I always hesitated acknowledging my random lucky streaks because to me a person with luck eventually runs out of luck too.  But I guess I will continue to believe and live like luck is on my side.

Oh yeah, marriage really does take work

Tae and I have been together since July 17, 1997.  Sixteen years this July.  For the first 10 years, our relationship was easy and effortless.  We had an argument on average about once a year.  We loved spending time together traveling, playing golf, going out to eat and hanging with our friends.  

When Lauren came into our lives on July 22, 2007, the frequency of our arguments grew.  The first few weeks were hard as I adjusted to motherhood and "mourned" my previous life.  I snapped at Tae if a single bottle was left in the sink unwashed.  I got annoyed when he would get up for night-time feedings with me, and then fell asleep right in front of me when I had a newborn stuck to my breasts.  Then we figured out life as a family of three and we were back on track.

When Elizabeth joined our family on July 16, 2009, I went through an adjustment period as well.  I now had Lauren's feelings to worry about.  How was she adjusting to a new baby in the house when she herself was still a baby?  How did she really feel having to split mommy's, daddy's and grandma's time in an instant? 

Then the next three and a half years just whizzed by.  They were filled with helping two children start their school years.  Making sure they had (cute) clothes, backpacks, and extra set of clothes at school.  Giving baths, reading stories and tucking in for bedtimes, making breakfasts, doing the daily morning routines.  Keeping basics like milk, eggs and paper towels always stocked.  Scheduling like nobody's business to ensure I made every parent teacher conference, major school event like Pajama Night, Thanksgiving Assembly, and Fall Fair activities.  Strategizing drop-off and pick-up schedules with Tae and my mom.  Doing my best at work while leveraging every opportunity to be flexible whenever I needed it.  Earning promotions.  Managing through business travel one trip at a time.

Did you notice anything obvious missing?  There was nothing about working on my marriage.  Upon reflection, over the past five years, I have seen Tae more as a parenting partner than Tae as my husband.  The precious hours after bedtime were spent watching DVR'ed shows, online shopping, and more often than not, working.  I did not prioritize, nor did it occur to me: Connect with my husband.  I simply forgot.  Sounds so strange seeing it in writing.  Again in hindsight, this was the reason I was getting easily annoyed and irritable at him.  Then we reached a boiling point and we experienced the lowest point of our nearly 16 years together.  Our behavior was disgusting.  We used words and tones that we never used with each other before.  We totally disregarded each other's feelings and if I allow myself to be honest, I questioned whether our marriage was FUBAR (f*cked up beyond all repair).  It took us two weeks to decompress.  We did our own thing during that time (went to work on our own, didn't speak, etc.) and came together only in the evenings when we said good-night to the girls.  

At Montauk the summer after we got married.

Then it took our recent trip to Mountain Creek to reconnect as a family.  Our marriage wasn't FUBAR.  It just needed some deliberate reconnections, considerations, appreciation, grattitude and respect.  This is the case for any relationship by the way.  We were taught a tough lesson and it'll be up to us to make sure it wasn't for nothing by making the commitment to focus on our marriage, remember to have fun just the two of us and remember that being husband and wife is just as important as being mom and dad.   

Daydreaming about vacation homes

Ebi getting ready to hit the slopes.

I believe my girls are at the perfect age - 3.5 and 5.5.  They are still young enough to possess the preciousness of being little girls, but old enough where we can simply do so many fun things together as a family.  Last weekend, we went to Mountain Creek for the weekend.  Both L and E rocked their lessons.  Lauren spent a few hours one-on-one with Tae doing some runs.  There was minimal traffic to Vernon, NJ and absolutely no traffic coming back home. 

After I got home, I started looking for vacation homes.  How much is a 3-bedroom slopeside condo in Dover, VT (where Mt. Snow is)?  How much are property taxes?  Can we pull this off financially?  Even so, Tae and I have full-time careers.  How will we find the time to enjoy it?  Admittedly, this was not the first time I daydreamed about a vacation home.  I get into this mode every summer after dishing over $5,000 for a week-long rental in Montauk. 

This is the perfect example of dreaming big.  We may never get a second home.  But we definitely won't get it if we don't start with a dream or goal.  Most importantly, I am just so grateful to have my family and enjoy our blessed lives together.

Hands on knees!

Lauren and Tae in line for the lift.

I told Ebi not to eat snow.  And of course, in true Ebi fashion, she ate snow.